Sex In The Public Square - Choice - Comments

The power of informal

Elizabeth — Mon, 03 Mar 2008 03:46:28 -0800

The power of informal conversation should not be dismissed. Stacey, I love that you note:

I have lots of friends who have never attended a single SWOP meeting or DA conference. They never even look at BnG. But every time they see me they want to know what's going on, what's new, how many people have registered, who's presenting, etc. They enjoy getting information in a more informal, personal context.

Those conversations are so important and I'm grateful for the reminder, especially today. The first thing we can do in support of social is have individual conversations about what's going on. On its own it isn't enough, of course, but it is the foundation on which so much is built.

Does more get done in private or in public?

Stacey Swimme — Sun, 02 Mar 2008 21:16:14 -0800

I think that what has fueled the success of sex worker activism in recent years is partially related to how well sex workers operate in informal communities and networks. Obviously, privilege is a lens that should be applied to the recent history of organizing, especially in terms of access to tech/communication and travel resources.

I think that perceptions of what is/not political should not limit our understanding of what has been most effective. I think the quiet relationships that sex workers have with each other in non-political contexts is where the real action occurs. The public stuff only exists to strengthen those relationships and promote those introductions. Art shows have historically been the major entry-point for sex workers into any sort of public expression about their work I think often because they are inspired when they hear other people's stories and are seeking out community. I think those are factors for activists in the same way that they are for artists. And of course, so much art is activism, but a lot of art is not political.

I also think that we have a responsibility to get information out to those who are or can be impacted by our work and seek to create relationships that make providing input and taking *leadership* accessible and desirable. If people don't want to be involved, that doesn't necessarily mean that they don't want you to be. And if they actually express that they feel what we're doing is bad for them, that seems like an issue that needs to be raised within the community- we should invite that info.

I have lots of friends who have never attended a single SWOP meeting or DA conference. They never even look at BnG. But every time they see me they want to know what's going on, what's new, how many people have registered, who's presenting, etc. They enjoy getting information in a more informal, personal context.

They may be the same people who get a thrill out of posting one anonymous story to a blog, but don't really care to analyze legislation- although, they often do call or fax when we have an action if I call and ask them to! Lack of participation doesn't necessarily mean a lack of support or interest in what we're doing.

A somewhat related thought- I really think it's important that within organizations and projects we are supporting each other to take breaks whenever necessary. I think people pushing themselves to make the whore-revolution happen in our lifetimes are prone to burn-out. And there's nothing better for burn-out than just completely dis-engaging for a while. So we have to be promoting younger and newer leadership all the time so that things roll smoothly as people drop in and out over the years...

I agree that most sex

Amanda Brooks — Fri, 29 Feb 2008 13:24:04 -0800

I agree that most sex workers want to be quietly left alone to do their jobs and aren't interested in the political ramifications of what they do.

That being said, activists work very hard at being as inclusive as possible (and still get nitpicked for not being inclusive enough). The best way to make sure needs are covered is by talking to those types of sex workers or trying to make them welcome.

However, maybe the definition of activist needs to be as broad as "sex worker." A sex worker with a popular blog is an activist, of sorts, whether they want to be or not. A sex worker who teaches her clients how sex workers like to be treated is an activist. A sex worker who votes based on how the candidates approach sexual issues is an activist.

Activist is a scary word and one I'm still not quite comfortable with. Yet it's something I've been unconsciously doing for a long time --in small ways. I don't know that this answers Audacia's questions.

Maybe the best path is for activists to do their thing as well as possible and let sex workers come to them to express their feelings on an issue. Yes, activists have to be inviting (and I have other thoughts on that!), but as fellow sex workers, it's not a big divide to bridge.

Good question

Amber Rhea — Fri, 29 Feb 2008 06:57:31 -0800

It's a good and important question. And I agree w/ Ren "leave them alone" - to an extent. That is, don't try to force people to go to rallies, public events, etc. if they don't want to. But at the same time, how do we make sure not to ignore their concerns and voices? It's like I was saying on another thread, I've had conversations w/ several friends locally who are or have been sex workers, and they feel intimidated and alienated by what they perceive as the overly-politicized nature of blogs such as Bound Not Gagged. They feel like they can't interact there because they don't want to frame everything in political discourse; they just want to talk about their experiences, and they feel like everything they say will be scrutinized and misinterpreted.

And in Atlanta specifically, there seems to be, historically, more resistance to this kind of politicization of sex worker rights issues, which is what makes organizing so difficult. (Our Dec. 17th event may not have been huge in numbers, but it was a huge deal in terms of making things like that happen in Atlanta.)

Good point. I honestly

RenegadeEvolution — Fri, 29 Feb 2008 03:30:46 -0800

Good point. I honestly think if people want, generally, to be left alone...it is best to just leave them alone. I think of this often when people mention Farley's 90%...these statistics are bad for a variety of reasons, but one of them, most simply, is many sex workers really probably mention nothing because they wish only to be left alone...by everyone. They have their reasons, and I think those reasons need to be respected.

The last question

Nobilis — Thu, 28 Feb 2008 21:04:01 -0800

"Is it right to represent their interests (or their assumed interests) if they aren't interested in being interviewed/surveyed/studied?"

I remember something I saw on MTV once, a "Private Service Announcement" by Laurie Anderson. (yeah, this was some years ago, I'm dating myself) She talked about an event that happened where she and some other friends were picketing a Playboy club, holding signs with chicks and bunnies and foxes, protesting the portrayal of women as animals.

One of the women who worked there came up to her and said, "What do you think you're doing? This is the best job I've ever had. I *like* it here. Why don't you go down to the sweatshops where the women are making pennies an hour, and picket down there?"

If you haven't talked to someone, how do you know what her interests are? How do you know what she wants?

And when it comes right down to it, how do you know what YOU want? We think we do, but how often are we right?

Parents of teens

Elizabeth — Thu, 12 Jul 2007 21:01:29 -0700

TracyA, thanks for the link to the UNESCO report, and thanks for jumping into the thread. I hope we get lots of parents of teens and young adults in here to help shape the discussion, but in the mean time I hope you'll contribute as often as you can. Your perspective as a parent and as an expat is especially interesting!

field trip to planned parenthood

tracya — Thu, 12 Jul 2007 00:43:12 -0700

i'm sure we all agree that teen sex education and prevention of pregnancy is the place to start, something planned parenthood does very well. it's unfortunate that pro lifers see and exploit ONE aspect of their services as promoters/providers of abortion services. i still find it scary that some people particularly in the US feel it's okay NOT to educate teenagers about their bodies and sex. i am living in england now, and it's pretty dismal here as well. england has the highest teen pregnancy rate in europe, and fueling it is lack of education and state benefits for the moms. i've been told that a 16 year old girl here can get her own apt if she gets pregnant, an incentive if you want to move out of house. the dutch are held up as the gold standard as far as teen sex education, i recently watched a documentary where they sent 6 british 16 year olds to the netherlands to see how they approach the subject. very interesting and refreshing. i don't see that kind of honest open approach taking america by storm but that's why we're all here, isn't it???

http://www.unesco.org/courier/2000_07/uk/apprend2.htm

as a mom to 3 young people aged 16-26, i have a big interest in this subject...i hope that won't conflict with my future posts on the BDSM threads!!

YMCA field trip

Elizabeth — Wed, 13 Jun 2007 15:34:05 -0700

I think there's something symbolically interesting about the Young Men's Christian Association taking a field trip to Planned Parenthood. Good for them!

As for "equal time," I'm sure that the students got exposure to many interesting and complicated ideas: women's health care as a priority, the importance of reproductive freedom, strategies for conducting protests, the oversimplified framing of a complicated issue ... That's much more valuable educationally than just getting two views on a controversial question in a classroom.