What makes a good play party?

RC, another excellent question! I love having you around these forums! I've been thinking a lot about my assorted play party experiences and I find myself having a hard time coming up with a "formula" that distinguishes the good ones from the not-so-good ones. One thing that does seem to be true at the play parties I've enjoyed, and less true at the one's where I've felt -- oh -- less engaged, is that at the "good ones" a wide range of sexualities has clearly been accepted. I also like best the parties where the rules are clearly posted and where respect is evident in people's interactions with each other (e.g., where I don't get touched without first being asked, and where I see lots of appreciative and respectful voyeurs instead of energy vampires). I know this sounds vague. I think I'll step out a minute and let others jump in. I'm sure I'll be back! So, what does make a good play party?

i suppose it's like any kind of party, very hard to put your finger on it. obviously the location, people and mood but maybe it's something more like the right alignment of the stars! or the feng shui!!!

seriously, i think having clear rules is important in play parties, so people feel like they can relax and yet not have their space violated until they are ready. people come for different reasons, some come knowing they will only watch and others come looking for action and the rest undecided. my impression is that it takes a longer amount of time for people to relax enough to actually engage and that should be taken into account during the planning.

makes me wish i had plans to go to one....i could report back!

TracyA, so glad to see you back! I hope we'll be seeing more of you around here! I've been thinking more about play parties since this thread was started, and it occurs to me that it would be great to hear from some party organizers: What do you do to create the kind of party you like to attend?