Good News: That Bear Stearns Stock Isn't *Totally* Worthless

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I think I have a crush on Miss Victoria X. It's true that I don't patronize pro-dommes, partly because of a budget that, in a particularly profitable month, might allow me to purchase the privilege of a scornfully lifted eyebrow from one as she passes me in midtown Manhattan on the way to beat the hell out of some corporate lackey at the Plaza. However, were I in the market, I think that Miss Victoria X would be on my list.

I found Miss Victoria via another tip from Sarah Jenny. Miss Victoria's heart, it seems, has been melted by the plight of the poor employees at Bear Stearns, and she's providing a special offer to employees, ex-employees, and soon-to-be-exes: if you buy a session with Miss Victoria, she'll give a discount equal to the price of one share of Bear Stearns stock.  When she first made her offer, BS stock was at two dollars, which wouldn't buy you a latté at Starbucks; the discount has risen with the price of the stock, and now stands at $10.85. Miss Victoria, in her utter benevolence, has already come up with several potential scenarios for her clients:

-domestic service training (useful in preparing for future job as a janitor at Goldman Sachs)
-spanking combined with verbal chastising ("Caused!" -whack- "Sub-prime!" -whack- "Crisis!" -whack- "Very!" -whack- "Very!" -whack- "Naughty!" -whack whack whack-)
-78 cane strokes (number chosen to represent the difference between Bear Stearns' $80 per share book value and the actual current share price of $2)
-interrogation roleplay (I am Coughlin Stoia and you are Bear Stearns. Helpful in preparing for upcoming deposition)
-master/slave roleplay (I am JP Morgan and you are Bear Stearns. Now I own you)

Potential clients will be asked to arrive with $300 cash. The discount will be given in ten one-dollar bills, three quarters, one nickel, and four pennies. The client will receive them one at a time, and will thank Miss Victoria for her generosity after each.

This is great marketing, yes, but it's also great satire. After looking over Miss Victoria's blog as a whole, it got an immediate spot on my blogroll and on my daily feed. She has a really wry, sharp sense of humor about sex work and it never takes the snark into the smug self-satisfaction that characterizes a lot of blogs.